Time for Sunday lunch, your weekly hearty hate stew, and this one will really stick to your bones. Or chill them. This week’s topic: MTV’s “Paris Hilton’s My New BFF,” the grandest exercise in televised narcissism I have ever seen. Keep in mind, I watch these shows so you don’t have to.

The gist of the show is you have a bunch of imbeciles competing– yes, competing– to become Paris Hilton’s best friend while on camera and only until the end of the taping of the finale episode, but not in any legitimate sense.

Naturally, this leads to a cast of sycophants participating in activities like “always looking hot,” doing whatever Paris tells you to without complaint, seeing who can party the longest, etc., all while providing a truly endless supply of compliments and adoration to one Paris Hilton. Most noteworthy of all aspiring BFFs is Onch, below.

First of all, that is a dude. My estimation was that what Chris Crocker was to Britney Spears, Onch is to Paris Hilton, so you can imagine my surprise when I learned that Chris and Onch had some sort of feud that I don’t quite understand or care about, sometime last year.

Anyway, this show is pretty unbearable, but if you’re in the mood to yell at your television, this just might be for you.

[Picture source: MTV.com]